Coors Light Cold-Activated Cans

Even the beer companies are hurting in this economy… they all try to have these elaborate gimmicks on their cans to get you to buy them. My favorite one is the new cold-activated cans for Coors Light. The mountains on the can turn blue when your beer is “as cold as the Rockies…”


Listen, if you can’t tell your beer is cold when you’re holding it, maybe that should be your last beer.

If you’re so drunk that you no longer have feeling in your hand to tell the difference between hot and cold… taking a lukewarm sip of beer is the least of your concerns.

If you’re that drunk, maybe instead of the mountains on your can turning blue, Coors Light could invent some other technology that would help you when you’re at that level of drunkenness. Like, something that will stop you from kissing that girl with the visible cold sore... or not eating that week old thai food that's been in your fridge at 3am...

Any other ideas for some better Coors Light technology?

--Robbie

"We Run LA!"

I’ve noticed that just about every chick on Facebook has at least one photo album titled “We Run LA” (sometimes they even get creative and use a different city! e.g. We Run Vegas!). I get that it’s a song title you’re quoting, but if there were a version of hack comedy for photo album names, this would be the “airplane food is gross” of the Facebook world.


It’s especially annoying when you open these photo albums and it’s just the same 4 chicks in every picture, sitting down and drinking cocktails at a bar. Is that how you run LA? I think Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa (yes I googled that) would beg to differ. Villaraigosa is the Mayor of Los Angeles, cheated on his wife with super hottie Mirthala Salinas, broke up with her and now he’s dating Lu Parker, another babe--and he looks like a toolbox. That guy runs LA, literally and figuratively.

It has to be the biggest exaggeration in the history of modern man (irony intended) to say that you “run” LA. You don’t run anything; you got free drinks at ONE bar because you made out with BOTH bartenders. You aren’t the mayor of LA, you’re a better than average looking hooker, who only kisses (classier!) the guys but gets paid less (dumber!) than a normal hooker. You get booze, real hookers get crack…. And herpes. So I guess you still win. Congratulations, you narrowly defeated a crack-whore.

-Robbie